A Feather on the Breath of God

I've always loved that phrase. It makes me think. It makes me happy.

I'm just a little feather on the breath of a big God.

(Also makes me happy 'cause Hildegard of Bingen first said it and I just studied her in my Music Literature class. Yay for studying without trying!)

When the day of Pentecost came, they were all together in one place. 2 Suddenly a sound like the blowing of a violent wind came from heaven and filled the whole house where they were sitting. 3 They saw what seemed to be tongues of fire that separated and came to rest on each of them. 4 All of them were filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit enabled them. (Acts 2:1-4)

"A sound like the blowing of a violent wind", huh? Sounds like a completely terrifying place for a little feather. How can a little feather do anything to resist a "violent wind".

Then Peter stood up with the Eleven, raised his voice and addressed the crowd: “Fellow Jews and all of you who live in Jerusalem, let me explain this to you; listen carefully to what I say. (Acts 2:14)

Peter stood up?!? In Luke 24, it says that the disciples were "startled and frightened" to see the risen Jesus! What's this Peter guy doing?!? How could he ever have that much courage to speak?!?

There's no way possible... Unless he's a little feather too. A little feather on the breath of God.

(Here is where you go read verses 15-36, 'cause they're awesome. But I shall not post, because I want to get on to verse 37...)

When the people heard this, they were cut to the heart and said to Peter and the other apostles, “Brothers, what shall we do?” (Acts 2:37)

Woah. I mean, this Peter guy just made these guys think. Was it that good of a sermon? *reads again* What's his secret?

Oh wait, that's right... Peter's just a little feather on the breath of a big God. This isn't about Peter. Peter's words did nothing. The Spirit's words did everything.

Peter replied, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. 39 The promise is for you and your children and for all who are far off—for all whom the Lord our God will call.” (Acts 2:38-29)

We will receive the Holy Spirit? We will be filled with the power of God? We shall be swept along with the rushing wind? Could the power that raised Jesus from the dead... the power that brought Peter to courage... Could that be in me?

*dances with joy because God*

I'm a little feather on the breath of God, and God's been changing me. A lot. I don't recognize myself sometimes. I feel like a different person.

Jesus answered, “Very truly I tell you, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless they are born of water and the Spirit. 6 Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit. 7 You should not be surprised at my saying, ‘You must be born again.’ 8 The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit. (John 3:5-8)

Spirit, blow your violent wind through my campus, through my town, and through my world! Sweep us up to do your will, to dance like little feathers on the breath of God. May everyone see the glorious  works of your hands in our lives. May we experience revival!

Blow, oh violent wind! This little feather is ready!

The Mission - part 2

My time in Nashville climaxed with the arrival of the Fine Arts Summer Academy. This was my first year to be a "mentor" (basically, mini-faculty). I also have a newly found respect for coffee.

In the 2 days right before FASA began, I found myself in the music library of the college with a giant printer (we named it Sven), a dropbox account packed with sheet music, a bunch of un-assembled name tags, and like 200+ meal cards. And a guy named Cole who volunteered his time. And a slice of oreo cheesecake from Cheesecake Factory.

Somehow, over those 2 days, I managed to get only about 4 hours of sleep each night. Registration day came and I handed out the *multitude* of sheet music I had just printed the days before.

Somehow I ended up a unofficial official music librarian for the rest of camp.

27,000+ pieces of paper, not near enough sleep, a twisted ankle, and a happy heart later...

I've printed portrait, landscape, enlarged, reduced, letter, legal, double sided, stapled, hole punched, copied, scanned, pdf, mux, word, pages, mac, pc... replaced the toner, called tech support (twice), cleared at least 2 paper jams, and practically trained for a marathon delivering music to the jazz band.

During my time, I got a chance to build relationships with almost everyone at camp. Were they the deep, life-changing, future-biblical-counselor relationships? Not yet. But the relationships were built on a foundation of service, and I pray that the foundations will provide for beautiful friendships in future years.

One of the most special moments was taking 4 10-13 year olds for popscicles and spending an hour listening to the sweet childhood thoughts. Now, hopefully, those 4 little girls (plus the ones we managed to pick up along the way just for fellowship) know that there's someone out there they can turn to. I love those girls, and I am so thankful for their cheerful companionship. And the coffee they brought me. :P

Another beautiful, unexpected moment happened when I ended up teaching 5 private lessons. Some of private lessons were simply lessons, where hopefully I was able to impart some violin wisdom to the kids. Other lessons, though, ended of being more. A few of the girls I taught were very talented girls... who didn't believe that they really did know how to play. I found myself teaching them, not something new, but that they really did know how to do the techniques they were struggling with. It seems so simple, yet to hear the difference by the end of the lesson was truly incredible.

I arrived home physically sick and exhausted, and I slept for 12 hours the night after FASA, just to sleep almost all day in the car the drive home. I don't know that I've every worked harder day in and day out in my life. My payment? A full heart and a bunch of facebook friend requests.

This was my mission trip. It was perfectly designed just for who I am, and I can't imagine any other way of spending my summer. I wouldn't change a thing about my FASA, and I can't wait until next year.

A Mission of God's Own Design

I planned a vacation for myself. I would go and stay with friends in Tennessee for a few weeks before music camp. It would be awesome. I'd explore Tennessee with my friends and have an nice relaxing time. I would read books and drink tea and have fun.

However, God revealed to me that he had bigger plans for my summer. As it says in Isaiah, 

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater, so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands. (Isaiah 55:8-12 NIV)

And so, departing for Tennessee, I came to the mindset that this was a mission trip of God's making, for God's purposes and of God's design. He would do with me what he wills.

I spent a little over a week in a lovely time of fellowship with my "big sister". Over my time with her, I learned so much about the reality of spiritual warfare (more on that at a later date) and oh so much about God's divine power. When I got on a little 9-passenger plane to Nashville, I was certain that I was about to do something completely AWESOME. I was going to make a huge difference! I was equipped to do great things for God! I didn't know what, but I knew I was 

I've been here for over a week and a half now. I'm living in a house with 11-15+ people in it at any given time. I've washed made meals and washed dishes for said large number of people. I've swept floors and done laundry. I've babysat kids and rocked screaming babies and pushed toddlers in strollers what felt like miles to sooth them. I've swept floors and washed sinks and counters. I've made coffee and tea and delivered it all throughout the house. I've chaised rabbits out of the recording studio (just roll with it ;) )

My current mission isn't glamorous. It's not fancy. It's not earth shattering, power releasing action like I expected.

And yet, how could I be more like Christ?

When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. “Do you understand what I have done for you?” he asked them. “You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. (John 13:12-16 NIV)

Indeed, though my tasks are humble in the grand picture of life, my simple tasks are grand. For I am getting to be like Christ. I am not here to be served, but to serve. 

And what joy in the simple tasks is to be found! Is not the beautiful community of the dinner table worth the hours spent to prepare it? Is not loading the dishwasher a lovely time to ponder life? Is there not love found in service? Is there not a lovelier feeling then to play with a young child, or to enjoy the company of a grandma (or two)? Is making people smile not worth the time taken to make coffee?

For how can I love if I am not loving how Christ loved, and how can I love as he did without serving?

Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” (Matthew 20:26-28 NIV)

So, I find great peace and joy in my task of washing dishes. Is this the mission that God planned for me? Is his grand orchestration of life for me to be in Nashville cooking large meals for this season?

Yes, it is. Maybe there's more coming, maybe not. And, my friends, either way would be enough. For nothing can be more important then what God has planned, not anything I could imagine. My joy is from God, who loves through me by pouring love into me. 

If there's one thing I've learned, it's this - my mission is to follow God, wherever and however that might be. 

And so, I accept my mission and gladly go start the dishwasher.

(P.S. Households of 15 go through way more food and way more dishes than I ever imagined possible. Just saying.)

(P.P.S. I love the person who invented paper plates. I really do.)